Amazon Echo Is Like a Parody of the Worst Tech Product Imaginable

Amazon, the voracious digital department store on a Quixotic quest to make and sell computers, today announced Echo, a device that sits in your home listening to you constantly. Echo will answer your questions about “information, music, news, weather, and more,” but that’s just the beginning. “Echo’s brain is in the cloud, running on Amazon Web Services so it continually learns and adds more functionality over time.”

That’s right! Now you don’t even have to tell Amazon — the world’s most desperate selling-things company — what you want to buy. Just buy a $200 listening device, and Amazon will record all your wants, needs, and other conversations and send them to a “brain” in “the cloud!”

Echo responds to the name “Alexa,” so if you or another member of your household is named Alexa, consider a name change before purchasing.

Echo is available “by invitation only.” Don’t you want one?

Learn more — or don’t, actually — on Amazon